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Thread: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

  1. #16

    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by Allen View Post
    The best way to deal with it is to let them look! It's hard to deal with, but it's completely normal!

    It is time for you to educate your teens on what they are seeing, and to monitor where they go looking! If they know you can see where they been surfing they wont want to check out any extreme sites from home.


    Blocking their computers, grounding them, and that kind of stuff will just cause them to look more discreetly, and then you wont know what your kids are doing! Sheltering your kids, so they dont know it exists will leave them unable to deal with it later, when they need to know!!
    not letting your kids look at internet porn does not mean you are sheltering them. yes they need to know. but i plan to be the one that does the informing. i dont want my kid thinking some girl crapping out a beer can or banging a donkey is normal.
    Kelli ~ "I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy"
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  2. #17
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    I am so glad that my kids are past that stage...

    Cant you tell??! I am going to be a grandma in June
    Yeah, I'm a girl drivin a jeep you have a problem with that?

  3. #18
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by AZdezertgirl View Post
    My son is 11 also. If I saw him looking up porn on the net I would have a BIG PROBLEM with it! I would ground him for at least a month and would certainly use parental controls if I let him back on. I know that some parents are more leniant but I have heard of thing that they are doing now on those porn sites and its ... I HAVE NO WORDS FOR IT.. and you thinking a girl spitting a football out of her...is entertaining?? Dont you have a daughter?

    What about these boys in your house with your son looking at that crap with your 8 year old daughter in the house?? Id be freaking out if I were you! Boys seeing those sort of things make minds race. and I wouldnt trust one of em around your daughter.. especially if they are hunting for it.

    Not making a big deal out of it now.. will only let your son think that you will be ok with other things (that are a big deal) in the future.


    I dont even let my son watch COPS.. He knows there are sick perverted idiots in the world because we talk about that sort of thing. but i dont need him seeing a bunch of drunk, stoned idiots on TV and people laughing at them like they are humorous. I want my son to see drunken, stoned idiots as what they are.. Drunken stoned LOSERS! not someone to laugh at and make fun of but to look at and feel sorry for. so he doesnt think acting that way in the future when drugs and alcohol are present will get him attention. I also dont let my son watch all these movies that are completely related to people getting high and drunk and its supposed to be comical?? How is someone who has devoted thier life to dropping out of school and getting high and drunk everyday comical? uhmmm OK?? Like that movie loathing in Las Vegas? That whole Movie is about two guys in Vegas getting high on acid.. THE WHOLE MOVIE! its ridiculous!

    Getting a glimpse of the 5 oclock news everyday is enough of a wake up call for him.

    Im lucky that he is into his runescape computer game and that the computer is in plain view of everyone in the household which makes it hard for him to be looking at anything inappropriate.
    Well, Kelli, you and I have different parenting styles. I refuse to shelter my kids from the real world. I wasn't sheltered and grew up normal, productive, and successful. Every kid in my wife's hard core christian perfect family is a F'up except for her. Her cousin is in jail for DUI hit and run, and lost her kid to the state for child abuse. Her brother is a nice guy but a non productive leech of society(and has been in jail), and her other cousin has seen time in jail, and is 1/2 screwed up from all the drugs he did when he was younger. The parents of these kids live in million dollar homes, are holier than thou, and stifled the real world/street education most of us got as a youth and they rebelled. This is not the only family I've seen the perfect parents, terrible kids trend work out with. If you don't want you kid to watch cops, that's cool. You were not a boy growing up and you don't know what boys knew growing up. I'm 37 and the only thing I've learned since my youth is there's suposed to be some mysterious G spot on a woman. I'm still searching.

    I started exploring the female anatomy in 7th grade as most of my buddies did. That's next year for my son. I would assume for yours too. Girls start having sex from 13 - 16. Boys usually take a little longer to get going because they chicken out the first few opportunities. If ( for some reason) a 13 yr old girl has a fancy for your 13 yr old son when the time comes, you better have him educated in the use of condoms or you will be a grandma at a young age and probably raise the kid. Pretending the real world isn't out there to be a good parent isn't the way to go IMO. It's there, and your kids have access to it. The question is where do you draw the line?
    Last edited by chopped7; 01-09-2008 at 11:35 AM.

  4. #19
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by Fire Ball View Post
    I wouldn't let the world know you are "letting" your kids look at porn on the internet Allen, that will get you a visit from CPS and possibly a one way ticket to tent city or the Springer show any way
    My kids are too old for me to get in any trouble! I only had to lock up the videos when they were that young!


    ....anyways.....what do I know??
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  5. #20
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by AZdezertgirl View Post
    not letting your kids look at internet porn does not mean you are sheltering them. yes they need to know. but i plan to be the one that does the informing. i dont want my kid thinking some girl crapping out a beer can or banging a donkey is normal.
    I never said you should let your kids look at that kind of stuff. My guess is they wouldnt want to anyways! Most kids would get embarrased just looking at someone naked, I know I did!

    I just worry about that kids that make it to college without knowing what they are doing. Someone ends up pregnant after the first college party!



    ....by the way, I have two children of my own. Both have never done drugs and are the best kids I could wish for!
    We have another Jeep!

  6. #21
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by Allen View Post
    I never said you should let .... get embarrased just looking at someone naked, I know I did!
    There you go... bringing up that Elvis trip with you and Scully again....
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  7. #22
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by Fire Ball View Post
    I wouldn't let the world know you are "letting" your kids look at porn on the internet Allen, that will get you a visit from CPS and possibly a one way ticket to tent city or the Springer show any way
    I didn't say I was letting the world know my kid was looking at porn on the internet. I don't condone it but a porn website showed up on my computer. It could have been my wife checking out something funny a friend told her to check out(we all share the same internet access). Sublime is not all porn but most of it is. I haven't talked to my wife or my kid yet. I have just caught the neighborhood boys checking out bewbie wesites on my 'puter and have to assume they went to this site. It could have very well been that one of his friends said "go here", he saw it was adult content, and shut it down. They all go to funnyjunk, you tube, etc. for entertainment. I'm just glad he doesn't know about rotten.com yet.

    just re read and realized you were talking to Allen and not me. post still stands thogh

  8. #23
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Well, I have boys and girls and I am here to tell you that they both look and there is not a lot you can do to stop it short of locking them up. It is a natural part of growing up and I am sure that just about all of us have been there....some still are and some have major problems with it......yes, even Christians and no, it is not being a hypocrite, just being human.

    I do feel you have to take action tho and not just telling them "no" or grounding them from everything for half their life!! I monitor the systems in our home and the kids know it. Both kids thought they could get by with deleting the history but there are more ways to see it than that and they got busted again. We don't have a problem now, seems to have past but it was talked about openly, the good and the bad, punishment was set and followed and it finally just died away. Biggest thing to me is don't freak about it, that makes them want to look more to see why you are so hyped about it. Let them know it is wrong but don't traumatize them for being naturally curious.

    And Kelli, just because there is a young girl living there and some young boys are looking at porn on the inet, does not mean they will try any thing with her. We found a bunch of stuff at a friends house when I was younger and he had a younger sister, we never even considered her when looking at "stuff" and I think it is that way with most kids.......just my experience and opinion tho.

    For us, we had talks about it and followed that with computer restriction and only using it for school and only with an adult, then they got access back but it was monitored, next offense was longer and third was longer.....didn't need a fourth. Watchdog programs and internet nanny software was a PITA and normally did not work right anyway, most times if it was running they could not go where they needed for school research. I have worked on computers for 20+years and they know they can't fool me, so they quit trying


    Anyway, my opinion and what worked in our home with 4 kids
    USAF Retired
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  9. #24
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Can you keep kids from drinking and having sex and looking at porn on the internet...Hell no.

    Can you educate them to make good decisions and right frm wrong....hell yes.

    That's all we can do and hope for the best
    Bill "Pack Leader ...... No Really" ---> http://www.azbordercollierescue.com/ Pets aren't products, rescue rather than buy.
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  10. #25
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    I agree completely Lugs! The best way to deal with it is parent interaction! Asking them "who spent 20 minutes looking around worldsex.com yesterday" goes a whole lot farther than clogging up the computer with site blockers!


    When they know that you know they will stop! ...at least until they can outsmart you!
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by mingoglia View Post
    There you go... bringing up that Elvis trip with you and Scully again....

    What happens on Elvis, stays on Elvis...
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Lol....boy did I ruin some of Mom's towels when I was a kid.
    My oldest was caught by his Mother on a questionable website while she was in the other room watching TV. He wasn't just looking either....he was acting out his fantasy. If I had caught him I probably would have made fun of his little junk, but Mommy went over and smacked him upside his head, screamed at him and left him sitting there with his limp biscuit in his hand.. Now tell me, if you were him, would you prefer I or she caught you? I felt sorry for him. I had the talk with him, and have had several since. He knows that those sites can really screw up the computer now, and that's my main concern about it. I bought him his own set of towels and told him to stay away from mine.

    What are you gonna do? Boys are gonna spank it, don't act like you haven't/don't. I got things in my spank bank that would make the devil blush.
    "The Edge...there is no honest way to explain it
    because the only people who really know where it is
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by Bilt4Comfort View Post
    Lol....boy did I ruin some of Mom's towels when I was a kid.
    What are you gonna do? Boys are gonna spank it, don't act like you haven't/don't. I got things in my spank bank that would make the devil blush.
    umm.....and I shook hands with you at Sunflower!!!!




    LOL


    I once heard a lecturer state that "There are only 2 types of people that do not masturbate or have not.....Pairaplegics (SP) and liars..."


    .
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by AZLugz View Post
    umm.....and I shook hands with you at Sunflower!!!!




    LOL


    I once heard a lecturer state that "There are only 2 types of people that do not masturbate or have not.....Pairaplegics (SP) and liars..."


    .
    Reminds me of the joke, (told to a woman) "Did you know that 90% of woman masturbate in the shower and the other 10% sing?". Then you ask, "Do you know what they sing?"... and when she says, "no", follow that up with, "then you're part of the 90%".
    Quote Originally Posted by djui5 View Post
    I'm an idiot.
    Quote Originally Posted by My Green Jeep View Post
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  15. #30
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    Re: So, I busted my 11 yr old looking at porn

    Quote Originally Posted by AZLugz View Post
    umm.....and I shook hands with you at Sunflower!!!!




    LOL


    I once heard a lecturer state that "There are only 2 types of people that do not masturbate or have not.....Pairaplegics (SP) and liars..."


    .
    No worries Lugz...I don't believe I glazed the knuckles that morning.
    "The Edge...there is no honest way to explain it
    because the only people who really know where it is
    are the ones who have gone over."

    Hunter S Thompson

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